This past month has been difficult. Health issues cropped up, leaving me not only physically drained but also emotionally stressed and fatigued. Anxiety flared, sleep suffered. I’ve spent this past month getting a hold of my emotions, of relaxing my anxious nerves and getting my life back. While I can’t say I’ve succeeded 100%, I have succeeded enough to where my life almost feels normal again. Right now, that’s a big deal.
So now it’s May, and I’ve started writing again. I missed April’s update for this blog, for which I apologize. I actually had an article already written that I had planned on posting, in which I discuss my thoughts on the editing process. Yet I couldn’t bring myself to post it. After the turbulence of April, discussing editing seemed insincere, irrelevant. Like I was trying to deny my own emotional turmoil and pretend that editing really was what was on my mind at that moment. It wasn’t, and still isn’t.
So instead I wanted to write an article about what is on my mind, of what’s important to me. And right now, it’s all about enjoying the little things. It’s about living in the moment as much as I can. Letting go of events in the past, trying not to worry about what might happen in the future. Instead I try to focus on the present and find pleasure and beauty in the things around me.
I used to run three times a week. Instead of running, I’m now walking daily. While I always enjoyed being outside while running, I never really appreciated my surroundings. I’ve started noticing things that previously had escaped my attention. Like how the trees rustle in the wind. Or the way a certain bird chirps the loudest in a particular area of the forest. I’ve watched, each day, as the snow melted and collected into pools and streams. I’ve watched as birds have flocked to these pools to bathe and hunt in the water. I’ve watched the small flowers blossom from the bracken and leaves of the forest floor. I’ve seen how the wild blueberry bushes have grown taller with buds that will soon blossom and leaf. I usually stop while walking, just to listen and smile and enjoy the moment. These moments give me peace and it is because of these moments I will continue to walk frequently, even after I start running again.
Although it is, perhaps, easier to find pleasure in the beauty of nature, I also strive to find pleasure in my daily life. I’ve started eating healthier and it’s a challenge I’ve decided to tackle enthusiastically. I push myself to see just how many fruits and vegetables I can eat in a day and the interesting ways in which I can eat them. I enjoy seeing and feeling the beneficial changes in my body. My waist and legs have slimmed; I have more energy, my headaches have lessened. I feel like I am being kinder to myself and that fosters feelings of love and compassion for myself as well.
I enjoy the fact that I am writing again and that I’m fortunate to spend each day doing something I love.
Focusing on the little things has helped me remember what’s important: my health, my family and loved ones. It has helped me to remember to embrace life’s challenges and to learn and grow from them and not to fear and worry over the uncertainties of the future. I can’t say I always succeed, but I’m getting better at it, and that’s enough for me.
What little things in your life bring you happiness?